GUYS, I’M STILL ALIVE

seriously

just at camp now

posts will be

sporadic

doh

answers to one round of “things in a hat”. the prompt was, things you wouldn’t want to name your band after:

• the mixed race Hitler assassins featuring horny hugo and the cunt punching goatse fuckers
• colin matty and the carolina crooners (will fuck your shit up)
• two inches from sin
• (drawing of a flying horse)
• FECES
• FAGGOT
• IF YOU LIKE US, YOU’RE AN IDIOT

yup.

two days.

two of my submissions for “hot plum jar”, a summer zine.

on the subject of the end of the world

cool like
       a gang
of bullfrogs
chirping deadwood
bridge
      dangling tooth
worn down to gum

again, we are wearing
our matching sneakers

            you know the ones,
bare ankles slicing away
from concrete.

if tonight,
we split the fibres of time,
your body would tip
her perfect tailbone
and spill you,
                treestung
            into the river

hands starred out
against the rock
soft constellations
of bone.

i take another breath
of air.
from the bushes,
more voices. fear laps
its tongue at the back
of my neck.

           still,
what i will remember
tomorrow:
the summer’s bulk
of heat, our beer cans
stacked into piles nearby.
the calmness of your body
as she inched, bursting
back towards
the way we came

*

gang of tiger cats
to andrew

a forest of tires
just above
where you told me
you weren’t going
to that party
because of
that girl

her hands, braided nets
trying to draw you
onto the deck
of her bed

we eat the pizza
you bought
cut into squares

talk about
our unattractive friends
your mouth
a tree opening

if this were a movie
we would hear
a warm guitar peaking
some massage acoustic

instead
this steady grinding

a soundtrack of cars

AUGH!

I keep looking at my calendar and getting re-startled by the fact that I leave in FOUR DAYS. This is… unacceptable. NOT READY! Getting there, though. Gradually. I think I’m hoping for some sort of zen epiphany which will make me feel like I am Ready To Go. It ain’t gonna happen though. Thursday and Friday are going to be busy days. I plan to drift around like a wraith in the city.

TO-DO LIST BEFORE VIRGINIA (JUNE 13)

• Finish summer zine (70% done)
• Get new sandals & shoes, damnit
• Pack!!!
• Fill out J-1 application, make sure everything is ready to go for customs
• Finish reading “How I Paid For College” & “Kavalier and Clay”
• Watch Jono’s movies
• Finish 2 lesson & 2 elective plans
• Burn CDs for Perks Salon
• Go to physio
• Create yoga routine for mornings & waking
• Figure out “the deal” for Thursday’s party

after neil’s party and the epic ride home, sat on my bed with baby belyea, listening to sufjan and discussing how nice it is to have a sister that you are genuinely friends with.